Thursday 13th March

We are still in the Philippine Sea (far Eastern edge), relentlessly making for Japan. North that is; towards the cold that is; just as we note that the UK is getting a mini heat wave. Funny that. We arrive at places and they say oh! Look, you’ve bought the rain we’ve been waiting for rain for over a year, yippee, humph. Never mind, after Japan we do a handbrake turn and head south again. Today is warm and sunny but still a bit windy, the sea has swung round to the south and is lighter, so as it is coming at us from astern, conditions have eased somewhat. Two talks this morning one by Sandra Howard on becoming an author, how she got into writing at 65, it was sort of OK a bit like the curates egg ‘good in parts’. The second by Diane Simpson on handwriting again, this time using samples of anonymous guest’s handwriting (we, the audience knew who they were, she didn’t) she gave an overview of their character, which turned out to be remarkably accurate.

We were on our own for dinner tonight as the other four on our table were going to the Jasmine restaurant for an Asian meal, so as it was a formal night I decided that as a bit of a wind up for Anna, I would sit on one side of the table and Carol would sit over on the opposite side. Which we did and it was a few minutes before Anna spotted us, she came over a bit nonplussed and tried to be polite; Sir, Madam, she began. We are dining alone tonight I informed her the others are going to the Jasmine, a hesitant oh? was all she could manage, as she clearly didn’t really know what else to say. Unfortunately at this point Carol could not maintain a straight face and Anna immediately knew she was being wound up. The relief on her face as she realised she would not be serving us across an otherwise empty table was a picture as I walked round to sit next to Carol again. Had I been paying more attention I would have noticed that glance across her shoulder as she went for the bread rolls, which could only mean one thing. She returned with the basket of rolls and placed one on Carol’s plate before coming round to me and as she placed one on my plate she said quietly enough for only Carol and myself to hear “sir is teasing me again?” Yes I’m afraid I am I admitted feeling rather pleased at the effect it had had on her. Nothing more was said, the wine waiter served the wine and Anna came back to pour our water and we chatted idly whilst waiting for the menus. Anna bought them over and handed Carol hers and then handed me mine, before walking away, again with that glance over her shoulder which this time I did notice, hmmm something’s afoot I thought as I opened my menu. And it was. My menu was written entirely in Japanese! Where do women learn that innocent look? Anna came over and asked, are you ready to order sir? as sweetly as ever and feigned complete surprise when I showed her my menu. Oh sir I am so sorry! I don’t know how that happened. I do I said, Anna is getting her own back. “I’m afraid I am sir” she said with a giggle replacing it with the English version, sigh! there was a time you could get away with these things scot free, not any more.